Because I always fuck up. Because even if my double was the one who decided to sleep with everyone, I would've done it eventually. I did it before. [he sighs, breath shaking] It's more than that. This whole murder thing? Oliver is a good person. He doesn't deserve to be around people who make everything this fucked up.
[oh. jack's own misery is forgotten as he listens to connor, turning his head to watch him after the first few words. and what does he say, as one fuck-up to another? how does he make him feel better when he knows that it would be a temporary balm at best?]
Why did you murder them?
[he thought before that connor must've had his reasons for it. he still believes that.]
It... [connor takes a deep breath, trying, desperately, to keep himself from falling apart in from of jack any more than he already has.] I didn't kill him. I was asked to go to our professor's house so we could pick up Wes' girlfriend. I didn't know she was stealing from our professor's husband. He found her, though. Chased her.
[sometimes the memory is a blur, like it happened to someone else. sometimes its so vivid its like it happens all over again]
He was going to choke her. He probably would've killed her. Wes hit him over the head with this trophy. And then...he died. And we took care of it.
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[jack's voice trembles with it. hurt, he could've endured, at least the physical kind. he sighs.]
Maybe I humiliated him too. The thought of his crown on my head, a king who sometimes liked getting on his knees.
[but not when it was to kiss the ground at his father's feet.]
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Whatever he did, or -- or said, it wasn't right. You didn't deserve any of it. Not because of liking guys. Or anything else.
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It ended the way that it should have. He lived - lives. And I'm here.
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Being here isn't a punishment. Even if it feels like it.
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[not just here, but at home too. a better person would've let oliver go and be safe a long time ago.]
You should try talking to Johnny. Maybe this is a good thing. You can be yourself without your dad watching over you.
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[about oliver. johnny - he wishes he had a shell to hide in rather than face him.]
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Why did you murder them?
[he thought before that connor must've had his reasons for it. he still believes that.]
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[sometimes the memory is a blur, like it happened to someone else. sometimes its so vivid its like it happens all over again]
He was going to choke her. He probably would've killed her. Wes hit him over the head with this trophy. And then...he died. And we took care of it.
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[jack wonders if he'll give himself a break if he hears that enough.]
You're a good person. Good people always get caught up in other people's bullshit.
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[i guess hes just determined to prove he's not a good person.]
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[he laughs a little bit]
If things weren't so complicated, I'm jump you in a heartbeat.
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[the laugh sounds good from him. it makes him feel a little bit better.]
But I won't complicate them more.
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[#gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay]
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