benumbing | inbox.

now you're not even trying. is this a sext or not?

i like that me telling you i'm pregnant is a prelude to sexting

actually how did you escape being a baby daddy before

[ SOMEONE GOT DISTRACTED ]

My mother took care of it.

[which sounds wrong, but johnny will know what he means.]

oh

[ johnny knows. and he also knows how much jack doesn't like talking about shiloh and / or anything to do with it. he quickly steers it away, saying the first thing that comes to mind: ]

hey do you have raisins?

so this is a sext.

no, i don't have raisins. why?

[ no it's a stupid pick-up line. ]

how about a date, then?

I'd almost forgotten how hideous your lines are. Almost.

you like them and you know it

how about that date, huh?

As long as you realize that a date means taking me someplace interesting.

think really hard about a haunted room and let's see where we go from there

is that interesting or should we just randomise it

A haunted room is only a date if you get off on wearing sheets.

[yeah, he might be busting your balls a little, johnny.]

Edited (to make it worse, why else) 2016-04-02 02:04 (UTC)

[ He's happy to have his balls busted ad long as jack doesn't hire a prostitute to spite him. ]

how about dinner fit for royalty under the sea?

[ maybe if he wished hard enough.... ]

[that wasn't spite. if it was spite, jack would've done it in front of him.]

Alright. I'll give that a chance.

[ THAT WOULD BREAK HIS HEART INTO A MILLION PIECES. ]

now did you say you wanted sexting?

because i'd say that i want to eat chocolate and cherries off your body

Liar. You want to eat bacon off of it.

[ This is one of the many reasons why he loves you. ]

id wrap it around your dick and eat off it

I'll suck you off and lick you clean after

You are so deeply disturbed. No wonder I love you.

HOW IS BACON DISTURBING

i love you too. you know that, right?

It's more about what you're willing to do as long as there's bacon involved.

Yes.

i would do anything for bacon and salami

have you never wondered what bacon flavored come tastes like

you're my home

You're disgusting.

And also mine.

but you like it

dont push me away again

[it takes him awhile to respond.]

I'll do whatever I need to do to keep us together.

[ this is both the most romantic and ominous thing he's ever heard. ]

are you planning to kill someone

I would never do that out loud. Not even through a text.

(no subject)

fulminants - 2016-04-04 12:28 (UTC) - Expand